


our love is stone cold

by hyejuul



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, F/F, Heavy Angst, NO LIKE REALLY, idk how to tag this honestly, if it feels incomplete then you're on the right track
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:21:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27034114
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hyejuul/pseuds/hyejuul
Summary: Ha Sooyoung is a curse.At least, that's what Jung Jinsoul thinks as she watches her strut across the dance floor.-Based on The 1975's song, "Somebody Else"
Relationships: Ha Sooyoung | Yves/Jung Jinsol | Jinsoul, Ha Sooyoung | Yves/Kim Jiwoo | Chuu, Kim Jiwoo | Chuu/Kim Jungeun | Kim Lip
Comments: 5
Kudos: 54





	our love is stone cold

**Author's Note:**

> I was listening to Somebody Else and got the idea for this fic because there's no angst in my life right now and I guess I'm making up for it through fanfiction. 
> 
> This is really sad and I'm kind of projecting my past struggles into it. It's a little shorter than I wanted it to be, but once I got to a certain point I decided that it would be better to make it feel incomplete because that's kind of how these types of relationships leave you feeling. 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you like it!

_“So I heard_

_You found_

_Somebody else_

_And at first, I thought, it was a lie_

_I took all my things, that make sound_

_The rest I can do without”_

_-_

Ha Sooyoung is a curse.

At least, that’s what Jung Jinsoul thinks as she watches her strut across the dance floor and to the booth where her friends reside.

(Jinsoul’s old friends, might she add.)

“Your face is going to get stuck like that if you don’t stop”

Jinsoul glances at the girl next to her.

She’s sitting at the bar, per usual now that she doesn’t have a group of friends to be with, strongest drink she can afford in her hands.

After a glance over the girl – blonde, skinny, long limbs, and plump lips – she huffs a breath and returns her gaze to her drink, “So what?”

The girl laughs, “You want your face to be stuck in a scowl forever? Never really heard anyone say that one before”

Jinsoul came here to get drunk enough to stumble around and feel like the world was spinning, not talk to some random girl at the bar.

She entertains her anyway, “Do you say that line to everyone you meet or something?”

The girl nods no, fingers tapping against her glass of beer, “Most people who come here don’t seem as upset as you”

Jinsoul wants to be offended, wants to tell the girl to fuck off somewhere else, but the distant look in the girl's eyes tells her that maybe she isn’t the only one who feels like the world is collapsing around her, “What’s your name?”

The girl whips her head to look at Jinsoul, eyes wide like a deer in headlights, “Oh, um, Jungeun. Kim Jungeun”

Jinsoul stifles a laugh.

Jungeun notices, pinching her eyebrows together, “Yeah, I know. Super unique name, right?”

“It could be worse”

“Really? What’s worse than that?”

“I don’t know, you could be named Hitler or something. At least you’re not a Trump or something like that”

Jungeun squints at her for a moment, and Jinsoul watches her throw the subject away in her mind, “I told you my name, what’s yours?”

She sighs, “Jung Jinsoul”

“It’s nice to meet you, Jinsoul”

Jinsoul waits for the butterflies to appear in her stomach, waits for her palms to start sweating, and face start to flush in shyness.

It never comes.

She’s not really surprised.

“What are you doing here alone?”

Jinsoul blows the air out of her mouth, fingers tracing the edge of her glass, “What every other person who goes to a bar alone does”

“Wallowing in sadness and self-pity?”

Jinsoul grimaces at the bluntness, “Yeah, you could say so”

“Well, at least you’re not alone in it”

Jinsoul glances at Jungeun again, taking in her appearance for real this time.

She hadn’t taken the time before to notice, but even under the dark lighting of the club, she can see the bags under her eyes, the emptiness they hold, the way her shoulders sag like she’s carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders, her rumpled clothes and lack of self-confidence.

Jinsoul watches her down the rest of her drink – which is almost half-full, might she add – and slam the glass back onto the counter a little too hard, “Bad breakup?”

Jungeun laughs sarcastically, “Yeah, you could say that”

Jinsoul nods, not really knowing what to say considering she was in the same position.

“You?”

“Yeah, you could say that”

Jungeun sighs, “Well, you don’t seem pitiful enough to be in the same club as the person who broke up with you, so you’re doing better than me”

Jinsoul grimaces, “Um, actually-“

Jungeun gives her a look that’s somewhere in between pity and disbelief, “You too, huh? It’s hard to get away from them, even in a big city like Seoul. I don’t blame you”

That doesn’t really make her feel any better, but she welcomes the understanding, “Are they here right now?”

Jungeun nods, waving a hand nonchalantly in the direction of the back corner where the big booths are.

In the same direction that Sooyoung happens to be in. Jinsoul chances a glance at the table, and of course her body sags in despair as she watches her ex-best friends laugh and drink together.

“Yours here too?”

Jinsoul nods, “Yeah, in that corner over there. It’s like they’re mocking me, but I doubt they even know I’m here”

“Wait-“, Jungeun turns her head to the corner that Jinsoul had gestured to, and Jinsoul watches in horror as her eyes practically bug out of her head and fingers grip tightly onto the glass in her hands.

“Jinsoul…Is your ex Ha Sooyoung?”

She feels stuck, and even though it’s the truth, Jinsoul has a sick feeling in her stomach that everything is about to go even farther downhill.

“How do you know-“

“She’s dating my ex. Kim Jiwoo. The one with the bangs”

Jinsoul frowns, turns her head just in time to see said girl press a sloppy kiss on Sooyoung’s cheeks. Jinsoul has never seen Sooyoung smile like that, never been able to make her smile like that. She doesn’t want to admit that the sight in front of her is real. She doesn’t want to believe that Sooyoung is really dating this Jiwoo girl, that they’re seriously sitting in each other’s laps, smiling and laughing like they have no care in the world.

“I think I’m gonna be sick”

“Already way ahead of you”

-

_“I don’t want your body_

_But I hate to think about you with somebody else_

_Our love has gone cold_

_You’re intertwining your soul with somebody else”_

_-_

Jinsoul waits until Jungeun stops heaving to sit down on the dirty bathroom floor.

She had thrown up first, already kind of an expert at it since it’s happened almost every night that she goes out to drink. Jungeun had seemed fine at first, but after a couple of minutes of silence and too distant of a look in her eyes, she had run to a different stall and done the same as Jinsoul.

They may have just met tonight, but Jinsoul figures that if she’s met the girl who her ex is now dating, they get to skip some steps in closeness. Jungeun had held her hair back and rubbed her back comfortingly, and Jinsoul would do the same.

“Okay, I think that’s everything. Thanks”

Jinsoul shrugs, leaning her head against the wall of the stall.

“This blows”

“Tell me about it”

After a couple of minutes of both of them sitting silently in the stall, Jinsoul starts to feel a little disgusted with herself and stands up, arm held out for Jungeun to take.

They stand slowly, trying to recollect themselves and brushing off what they can off their bodies.

Jungeun sighs, “Ready to try and face the world again?”

Jinsoul shrugs again, body drained, “Yeah, I guess so”

-

_“And c’mon baby_

_This ain’t the last time that I’ll see your face_

_And c’mon baby_

_You said you’d find someone to take my place_

_I just don’t believe that you have got it in you_

_Cause we are just gonna keep ‘Doin it’_

_And everytime_

_I, start to believe in, anything you’re saying_

_I’m reminded that I should be gettin over it”_

_-_

Jungeun nods understandingly and opens the stall door, both of them filing out and moving towards the sinks. Jinsoul gets a good look at herself in the mirror, silently saying a big fuck you to the bright lights illuminating the room.

She looks like absolute shit.

Her hair is messy and tangled now, shirt hanging weirdly off of her body and she can see a couple of stains near the collar. She literally looks like she puked the life out of her body, eyes sunken into their sockets and shoulders drooping way too low to be healthy. She glances over at Jungeun, notices her doing the same thing with herself.

_This is fucking pitiful. How did this happen?_

“There’s a good street food place around the corner that sells the best hangover stuff. You feel like going?”

Jinsoul sighs and grips at the counter, “I think if I eat anything, I’ll just throw it back up. I’ll tag along though, I have a feeling this won’t be the last time we see each other”

Jungeun nods, places her attention back to the mirror and the sink in front of her.

The two wash their hands and splash cold water onto their faces, both done with the night and ready to leave it behind them.

But like Jinsoul said, Ha Sooyoung is a curse.

The door swings open just as the two finish drying their hands, drunk giggles making their way into the room.

If Jinsoul would have known this is where she would be three weeks ago, she would have just stayed home and gotten drunk alone.

Sooyoung and Jiwoo stumble into the bathroom in each other’s arms, too focused on each other to notice the two girls standing still in pure shock and horror.

They both watch the two stumble some more, obviously a little too drunk, and they seem two seconds away from making out right in front of them.

Jiwoo’s eyes trail over though, and Jinsoul sees the happiness in her eyes leave in a flash, replaced with wide, terrified eyes.

“Jiwooming, what is it, babe?”

Jinsoul feels another wave of nausea take over.

Sooyoung had never given Jinsoul a nickname, even in the two years that they dated.

Sooyoung finally follows her gaze, body practically mirroring Jiwoo’s as she finally realizes who she’s in the bathroom with.

“Oh my god”

Jinsoul wants to be angry.

She wants to cry and scream, maybe punch Sooyoung a little bit to get her to feel some type of pain, something she obviously hasn’t been worried about for the past three weeks. Jinsoul knows that their relationship was falling apart, but to already have someone else?

Jinsoul didn’t even want Sooyoung. But she hated that she was with Jiwoo, hated that she was already establishing a bond with someone who wasn’t her. She hates that she’s been drowning in every single bad emotion in the world for the past three weeks, hates that she’s been going to this stupid bar almost every day to try and feel something while Sooyoung has been getting close and comfortable with another girl.

Why does she have to suffer when Sooyoung seems perfectly fine?

The awkwardness in the air makes her want to throw up again, she can even feel the leftover fluids starting to move and rumble, but she won’t allow Sooyoung to see her like that.

She sets her ex with a stone-cold glare, jaw tight and nose flared in pure anger. If she looked to her side, she would see Jungeun doing the same to Jiwoo. Contrary to Sooyoung, though, Jiwoo has the decency to look a little ashamed.

Sooyoung doesn’t look ashamed, but she does look very uncomfortable and a little confused, eyes shifting back and forth between Jinsoul and Jungeun. They seem to have sobered up significantly, relaxed bodies replaced with ramrod posture.

“Um, so…This is awkward”

Jungeun scoffs, like _really_ scoffs, Jinsoul can hear the disgust in it, “Really? That’s what you have to say?”

Jiwoo frowns, shrinking in on herself a little bit.

Sooyoung clears her throat, “Uh, excuse me for being a little confused, but, how exactly do you two know each other?”

Jungeun sneers, Jinsoul is almost a little afraid of what she’s going to say or do, but Jiwoo beats her to the mark, “T-This is Kim Jungeun…my ex”

Jinsoul watches the life drain from Sooyoung’s eyes.

Jiwoo glances at Jinsoul, “Uh, so, who are you?”

Jinsoul looks to Sooyoung for the answer, but all hope leaves her body when the girl can’t even look her in the eyes. It’s her turn to scoff now, “What, can’t even admit it to yourself?”

Sooyoung hangs her head, a hand coming to rub at the bridge of her nose.

After a couple of seconds of silence, Jinsoul decides this is her breaking point, and she won’t stand here any longer.

She sets her gaze at Jiwoo, eyes practically shooting daggers, “I’m no one important to her. Just an ex”

Jiwoo’s eyes widen even farther somehow, head whipping to look at Sooyoung.

Jinsoul is about the make her move to finally get out of this godforsaken bathroom, but the door opens once again and a familiar voice rings out, “Jiwoo? Sooyoung? Are you guys okay, you’ve been gone-“

_This seriously fucking blows._

Haseul’s eyes catch Jinsoul’s, and her eyebrows shoot to her hairline, “Jinsoul?”

She looks between the two pairs, obviously noticing the tension in the room. Jinsoul already knows what’s about to come next, and honestly, she’s tired and really pissed off, so she doesn’t hold back anymore.

“Don’t worry, _Haseul,_ we were just leaving, no need for you to play mediator this time”

Jinsoul knows it’s a low blow, knows that she’s verging onto her late 20’s and she really shouldn’t be acting like some teenager, but she’s tired and feeling incredibly betrayed.

Haseul’s bright posture falls, fingers coming to play with the hem of her sleeve.

She doesn’t waste any more time as she grabs Jungeun’s hand and pulls her out of the bathroom with her.

-

_“Our love has gone cold_

_You’re intertwining your soul with somebody else_

_I’m looking through you while you’re looking through your phone_

_And then leaving with somebody else_

_No, I, don’t want your body_

_But I’m picturing your body with somebody else”_

_-_

Neither of them say anything once they make it out, silently agreeing to weave through the crowd as quickly as they can and get out of the bar. Once they make it out and the cold air hits them, it’s like the floodgates open and Jinsoul can’t do anything but buckle under its force.

The tears slide down her face quietly, and she knows by the tightness in her body that this isn’t a sad kind of cry. No, she’s angry, furious even, absolutely baffled at the events that have played out tonight, and in more disbelief that Sooyoung was capable of hurting her like this.

Their relationship was never perfect, no one’s relationship ever is. But Jinsoul had truly tried her best to make Sooyoung happy, to give her everything that she had to offer. And it worked, but only for so long. Sooyoung was always on a different plane of existence, always worried about something else or another. She was a distant lover, and Jinsoul was okay with that for a while. But once it started to affect their alone time, the very rare and few times that Jinsoul really got to be alone with Sooyoung without any obligations hanging over their heads, she knew that it was only a matter of time before it crashed and burned.

Jinsoul knew that she had loved Sooyoung, she knew by the way her heart would flutter because of Sooyoung’s laugh, by the way her entire body would sag in relief when Sooyoung would actually touch her and hold her, by the way she probably would’ve done anything for Sooyoung, no matter what.

Sooyoung had been a good lover at first, but as time passed, she grew attached to something else, somebody else.

Jinsoul figures that person was Jiwoo, and the time that she spent on the phone talking and texting, doing anything other than giving Jinsoul her attention, was with her.

It’s almost like Jinsoul can see the scenes playing in front of her.

All the times that she would watch Sooyoung on her phone, watch her grow distant and drift away until it was too late. How did she not see this happening right in front of her? She doesn’t want to admit that she was blinded by love, blinded by her feelings that she thought were reciprocated in the same way. She starts to feel sick at the thought that the ‘I love you’s’ Sooyoung would mutter to her were fake, only said to keep the relationship afloat until she could drop her and leave.

“Hey”

She feels a gentle hand on her arm, squeezing just enough to feel grounding. Jinsoul looks to her left, feels absolute despair when she sees Jungeun in the same state as her.

“How long?”

Jinsoul angrily wipes her tears, doesn’t have to ask what Jungeun is asking, “Two years. We met right after college, worked for the same music company”

Jungeun squeezes a little harder, and Jinsoul appreciates it. She looks to the girl in front of her, silently asking the same question.

“Four years”, Jinsoul hangs her head, “We had been best friends since we were little, but we only started dating in college when she finally realized she likes girls”

“Jungeun-“

“No, it’s okay, don’t apologize. None of this is either of our faults, we just have to…”

_Have to what? Move past this? Pretend like we were never in love with the people we thought we’d be with until the end of time?_

Jinsoul can’t imagine how Jungeun feels, doesn’t really want to either. She must have been in love with Jiwoo for so long, and finally getting to be with her only to lose her so easily?

“We just have to get through it, yeah?”

She’s only known Jungeun for a couple of hours, but she can already tell that the girl in front of her is the type to act strong for everyone else’s sake, the type to push her feelings aside for some kind of greater good that she believes in.

She’s not going to let Jungeun do that to herself.

Jinsoul wipes the remaining tears from her face, takes a deep breath, and grabs Jungeun’s hand.

“Come on, you promised me really good street food”

Jungeun looks up in surprise, eyes darting all over Jinsoul’s face, maybe trying to find any faults or dishonesty.

She finds none.

She nods slowly and tightens her grip in Jinsoul’s hand, taking the lead and walking them off down the street and away from the club.

-

_“Get someone you love?_

_Get someone you need?  
Fuck that, get money_

_I can’t give you my soul cause we’re never alone”_

**Author's Note:**

> ig: kimberlylippington
> 
> twt: kimlippington


End file.
